From My Diary:
By Adolf Mongo Dipoko
Cameroon has in its consignment of credit, or [is it discredit] as a country of drunkards and this seems to be acknowledged by some of our closest neighbours, if not worldwide. However, before I give the full details of my statistical survey of what exactly I am talking about, and explaining how our drinking habits developed, permit me use myself as an example of how the outside world perceives of Cameroonians when it comes to drinking, and I may also add that other aspect of enjoyment. This what happened.
After my graduation from the Nigerian Institute of Journalism in Lagos Nigeria, I happened to have been selected among three graduates from this Institute to take up appointment with the then Benue-Plateau state owned NIGERIA STANDARD group of Newspapers based in Jos. I travelled to Jos, the highest landscape in Nigeria, and therefore the coldest city in the country. Fortunately, before my arrival, Jos, all arrangements had been made to accommodate me. I was lodged at the Hill Top Hotel. But I would confess that despite the comfort in which I found myself the cold was unbearable besides feeling lonely within the walls of a well furnished room. I decided to go down stairs at the Bar and have some whisky to at least warm me up. Surprisingly while at the Bar, I found myself ordering one shot each of four assorted strong drinks and sealing them up with a shot of lime, a thick and slimy brand of drink brewed in Nigeria.
It was a secret to stimulate heat in you in very cold weather and this secret was revealed to me by a friend back in Cameroon who had studied printing technology in Britain and later worked with the Presbook printing press in Victoria. Finding myself in such unbearable weather condition, I had to experiment this formula and it worked. After seeping down the almost full glass of the stuff twice, emptying the glass, I ordered for another round. But the Barman could not take it as a matter of mere enjoyment. ‘’OK, Sir just a minute’’ he politely told me and disappeared. Thinking that he was going to attend to some other customer before coming to serve me, he tarried for some time and the next thing I noticed was that when he reappeared, he was being trailed by a stout white man whom I later discovered was the manager of the Hotel. He looked at me with a mixture of surprise and sternness, not knowing exactly where to start his inquiry, because the Barman had told him without any reservation that there was someone at the Bar whom he suspected wanted to commit suicide. That person was me.
However when the manager finally spoke, he went straight to the point and asked me if I was alright. I told him I was, but that the cold is driving me to combat the way I am doing. I explained to him that this mixture produces heat in the body and that he too could try the mixture. I observed that he did not seem convinced with my explanation. Finally he asked me where I come from and when I told him I am a Cameroonian, I saw his countenance suddenly turned friendly and he said, ‘’No doubt’’. After a short friendly conversation, he ordered his Barman to serve me again. This time he paid the Bill. This demonstrates the acknowledgement of our drinking habits.
But how did we get into this disgraceful habit of drinking, that today one cannot see the difference between father, mother and children when it comes to drinking. In fact they seem to compete among themselves. All I can remember is that if salesmen in the promotion of any commodity in this country have performed so well, it is the sales men in complicity with the breweries who bear the crown of excellence. Between 1961, when we unified, there have been the following brands of beers. Let me start with the mother of all the beers, Beaufort, Stubic, Pils 200, 33 Export. In fact the list runs so long that I lack space for a complete account of them. But the question is, for whom were all these brands of beer intended for consumption. Certainly, they were intended to keep our minds away from hard politics, to subjugation, right from the very beginning. Colonialism certainly has a hand in this…